Written by:
Roscoe

Roscoe’s Quick Tips for a Great Bird
Olive oil, Worcestershire, and Cholula. That’s right, start with Roscoe’s Trinity. Mix it up in a bowl and lather it all over your bird (after you wash and pat dry, of course), and don’t forget the inside. Then you can season it, Roscoe recommends a mix of salt and pepper, paprika, chili powder and/or whatever else you like. Easy, yes?
To Stuff or Not To Stuff, That Is the Question
These days, the Stuffing Police are out in force, telling everyone how dangerous it is to put your dressing in the actual bird and let it cook like that, with the stuffing touching the turkey and all those germs and all that bacteria just waiting to kill us as soon as we sit down to eat. Never mind that we might pray before we dine, bacteria beats prayer every day of the week, according to the Stuffing Police.
How Did We All Live This Long?
Our kids have to wear helmets every time they get on a bike, you can’t take a newborn home from the hospital without a special carseat (that costs a small fortune), and if there’s lead paint within a mile, we all die immediately. But wait! Some of us grew up without helmets, without carseats or seat belts, and we even sat in the front seat of a car before we were 24 years old! How did we live through dangerous times like that?! It must be a miracle. Maybe that’s why we celebrate Thanksgiving every year.
Roscoe Says Stuff the Bird
So anyway… Our mothers, and their mothers, and their mothers have been putting stuffing inside the turkey for decades and we’re still here. So if you want to stuff the bird, stuff it, and tell the Stuffing Police to stuff it themselves. The stuffing will benefit from the juices of the turkey breast, and besides that, it’s just plain fun.

The Cook's Best Friend: Olive Oil, Worcestershire, and Cholula
Everyone Has Their Own Favorite
There’s an old adage that says never discuss religion or politics in a bar. Roscoe adds one more topic: stuffing. Whether it be bread stuffing, rice stuffing, with sausage, with oysters, or even if it’s a bunch of White Castle hamburgers crumbled up and stuffed inside your turkey, everyone thinks their recipe is the best. And you know what? It is. Why do you think Thanksgiving eve is the biggest bar night in the country? Because all those guys are out there bragging about their stuffing. Yes, fights break out: “You saying your stuffing is better than my stuffing?” “Darn right, it is!” “Why you no good son of a b*%#h, I’ll kick your a#$ right now!” And then the cops come, and the wives have to bail their husbands out of jail, but they’re not even mad, because the guys just say: “I was defending your stuffing, honey.” And it’s all okay. That’s how important stuffing is. Read the rest of this entry »