Written by: Roscoe |  Print this post and share it with your buddies!

The First Trick or Treat?

Since costumes hadn’t been invented yet (they barely had clothes, who’d have thought to wear something that made them look like something else?), Cave Men and Women had to make do with scaring the neighbors. That’s why they say “Trick or treat” instead of “Treat or trick.” They didn’t have treats back then, so they just tricked each other.

No Candy Yet

Candy wasn’t going to be invented for a very long time, but the Cave Kids weren’t bitter. In fact, they probably had a lot more fun on Halloween than kids do today, because no one bugged them about brushing their teeth so they wouldn’t get cavities and have to go to the Dentist (of course, drills hadn’t been invented yet, so kids weren’t scared of the Dentist, but that’s because Dentists hadn’t been invented yet, either; as soon as they invented Dentists, they invented drills).

Hobgoblins and Ghosts

Cave Kids weren’t really ever scared of the dark, that only happened after night lights were invented (the marketing campaign for night lights was vicious, but it worked, we still have them today). After all, what could be scarier than a T-Rex or a Woolly Mammoth on the rampage? So it wasn’t that easy to trick other Cave Kids, though you might think otherwise, since IQ tests hadn’t been invented.

Going Cave to Cave Caught On Fast

That’s really how Halloween started. Cave Kids would run from cave to cave, but instead of getting a treat, they got a trick, usually in the form of something being thrown at them: a wild chicken carcass, maybe, or perhaps a dinosaur tooth from a dead bronto. Kids learned to duck, and that’s how dodge ball was really invented.

Ours Is More Fun Than Theirs Was

Let’s face it, getting a bagful of candy beats a rock to the head any day. And since we have clothes now, and no one wants to be who they are anyway, it’s serves a whole lot of people to put on a costume and pretend they’re someone else (a big reason psychotherapy was invented).

Halloween Is For Kids Anyway

Just like it was back in the Cave Man days. Only now it’s pretty commercialized. But it gives kids something to look forward to, and keeps Dentists in business, so where would we be without it? Dodging dinosaurs and rocks. See, we’re making progress after all.

Happy Halloween from Cookin’ With Roscoe

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-Roscoe